As an addict involved in the LDS Addiction Recovery Program, I had to dig deep to find and embrace my inner Mormon. What follows is my journal from this point forward.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Recovdery Journal 20120228

Today was without incident.  I felt temptation to turn my last few days at my current employer into a affectionate farewell with with a coworker or two.  I captured my thoughts before they got away from me and turned my attention back to knowing what was right and feeling the strength of the spirit to do it.

I received a letter from my son.  I felt bad for the letter I wrote him.  I was in a state of high emotion, having felt disdain from Becky for suggesting that my daughter and her husband do not need to join  FHE if they have contempt for the things of the spirit that we teach.  I have become weary of feeling like I have to walk lightly whenever they are here.  I do not want my home to be a place where the gospel is watered down.  My wife felt like I was excluding them.  Perhaps I was, but it was not from a place of disdain, it was about having the spirit with us as I taught the lesson.  Too often the two of them approach with an attitude that detracts from this and I didn't want this to continue.  I offer many chances for family social gathering and welcome all.  But when the Gospel is being taught, I don't want to have to deal with a spirit of contempt.

Anyway, this made it into my son's letter and I fear I burdened him in a way I should not have.  I don't want this to get in the way of his work.  I think I will send a Dear Elder letter so it is not a worry for him.

My language needs improvement.  My desire for sarcasm and humor create an attraction to improper speech.  These need to be pruned.

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