As an addict involved in the LDS Addiction Recovery Program, I had to dig deep to find and embrace my inner Mormon. What follows is my journal from this point forward.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Letter to my Daughter. July 24, 2011

I hope that this letter is truly a treasure to you as you are a treasure to us.  You bring us such joy and in you I see a willingness to stand for principles in the face of much worry, loneliness, and uncertainty. I wish I had the capacity to take from you all the concerns that come from not knowing what the future holds.  I know the uncertainty about the future gives you much anxiety.
We have spent a large amount of our life worrying about the future and trying to control it.  We have always failed in these attempts.  This is especially true when our desires were for a future that was not the will of the Lord for our family.  We have realized that we are unable to see the future and even less able to control it.
Yet as we have learned to draw near to the Lord in our daily, life we have found his spirit guiding us in our life. While we remain concerned about the future, we find peace in knowing that all our wants are known tot he Lord.  Those things that we ask for in faith, knowing with that faith that what we ask is right, are answered with many blessings.  We have knelt in prayer so many times about the future and our anxieties.  Each time we have found the Lord there telling us that these things are in his hands and we are to focus on the living the Gospel and teaching it to our children.
We tell you this because you are likely reading this at a time in our life when we are considering major changes that will significantly impact the entire family.  This impact will affect you in ways regarding time with us and in having things like money to meet all of your wants.  Many times you have had to be patient in having things that you desired.  That patience may need to be extended if we pursue the path we see before us.  These things can give you much anxiety.  There is so much uncertainty in our life right now.
Yet, in spite of this, we can't help but feel a peace that tells us the future is still in the Lord's hands and all we need to do is press forward according to the guidance of the spirit we have sought.  This is where we will find peace and our troubled hearts will be calmed.
My daughter, you too will find peace in your troubled heart as you strive to seek the spirit each day.  I wish I could tell you your worry will cease forever, but I cannot.  Worry is part of our life.  We live in a time where the world on one hand seems to revel in riotous living and on the other hand trembles in fear from results of this life.  We sit in the middle, as Latter-Day Saints, despised for our beliefs, and yet feeling a certain peace in the  hearts that comes only from the spirit of the Lord.  This life we have chosen brings concern.
But I know that this concern can humble us and will bring us to the Lord and the Lord will bring to us the comfort of the Holy Spirit and he will let us know we are in the right path, doing things for the right reasons.  I feel myself hearing Moroni's challenge to us:
I would commend you to seek this Jesus of whom the prophets and apostles have written, that the grace of God the Father, and also the Lord Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost, which beareth record of them, may be and abide in you forever (Ether 12:41).
This is where our future lies.  This is where our certainty in this uncertain world is found. This is where the anxiety of the heart, mind, and soul are relieved.  It may be the only place where such relief is found. The Savior himself once said, "My peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid (John 14:7)."
We know this to be true.  We leave our witness to you that this is the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ and through it, a peace that the world will never understand is found.
We love you with all our hearts. Your concerns are ours.  Your joys are ours.  Never doubt our love for you.  It simply cannot be diminished by numbers.
Love,
Mom and Dad

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